Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Well? Vasectomy or No Vasectomy?

So I'm getting a vasectomy tomorrow morning. I've put it off a bit due to work and remodeling and school and other inconveniences. The time, however, is finally here.

this is an audio post - click to play
It is true that Cathy questions if this is the best course of action, she is primarily concerned with the possibility of her premature death. Her primary reasoning for rethinking the procedure goes thus: What if 1) she dies and 2) I remarry and 3) want kids later on? I figure the if...if...if... argument is not worth spending too much time on.

The fact is, we would probably make good parents, but I have no intention on having biological offspring (sorry, mom). I realize I am an only child, but I have plenty of half-brothers, so I am not concerned with my father not having grandchildren. If Cathy and I decide to become parents, I think we'll adopt.

"But it's different when they're your kids," some have said. Perhaps, but I'm not sure I need the difference in degree of immediate emotional attachment. Maybe I would love a biological boy or girl more than an adopted one, or at least love them differently without a difference in intensity. I don't konw... but I'm not convinced it matters to me. An adopted child has all the rights of biological offspring, which is exactly the relationship I picture between myself and God. Yeah, I know God loves Jesus differently than He loves me, but that doesn't make me feel differently about God, and I think that's the point.

I suppose I may chicken out tomorrow, but it is highly unlikely. The only things putting me off are the anticipated discomfort, my fear of sharp objects and the outside chance that my cats will stop loving me. When the kittens we raise for the shelter are "fixed" the other cats tend to regard them as completely different cats. I have settled all spiritual, emotional and intellectual matters, so all that concerns me know is the discomfort and the attention of my cats.

I'll likely not post for a day or so. :-)

Update: 08:30 A.M. 01/19/2006 - The scheduled vasectomy kept Cathy up all night. She told me this morning that we needed more time to talk about it. So... we'll wait.


  1. It is a very important decision to make-be sure and take your time.

  2. I have no existential experience, so I cannot determine if biology is key or not. However, anecdotal evidence does suggest that it is neither necessary nor sufficient for good parenthood.

    That said, I think God's idea is good parents with biological offspring, but the biological offspring of bad or missing parents should be raise by other good parents (like the Van Zwienens).

    While the procedure could be reversed, the doctors placed repeated emphasis that the "procedure should be considered permanent." I understand it is expensive, and without guarentee or warranty. :-)

    Well, for now, I'm "intact." :p